Identity answers the question, who I am and who I am not. An answer that is multi-faceted -both objective and subjective. Sometimes obvious and other times obscure. And to make it trickier, it shifts over time. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Ted Witzig Jr helps us understand the nature of identity formation and how we can better steward this area of our life.

Show notes:

Identity is:

• The sense of self - who I am and who I am not.

Aspects that make up identity:

• Demographics: age, sex, address
• Relationships: child, father, mother, husband, wife
• Roles: job, family, volunteer
• Values: likes, dislikes, religion, beliefs, loyalties
• Experiences: health, hobbies, accomplishments, ownership
• Personalities: gifts, character traits, talents

Events that unsettle identity:

• Development
• Loss
• Transition
• Role shifts
• Experiences
• Belief shifts

Process for forming identity:

• From exploration: trying, investigating, experiencing, researching
• To commitment: being settled, resolved and grounded

Troubles in forming identity:

• Moving to commitment without exploration.
  • This person’s sense of self appears settled. But it is not their own. They have adopted another’s identity. Crisis in life will likely cause distress.
• Remaining in exploration and not moving to commitment.
  • This person is restless, always searching without resolve.
• Not exploring and not committing.
  • This person is unaware of their need for identity formation.

Identity brings about:

• A sense of belonging, grounding, purpose, priority and worth.

The most important identity:

• A Christ-centered identity, being a child of God, is the identity from which all other identities rest. This identity offers stability when all others may ebb and flow.

We don’t like it when things are out of reach. Especially when they are good things. But sometimes they just are. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Brian Sutter helps us understand what health looks like amid the disappointment of our inabilities.   

Definition: Limitations are those things that we cannot do or achieve regardless of effort or resources. 

• Potential examples: IQ, Physical limitations, Mental limitations, Human developmental stage, Economics 

Reality: Limitations are often sources of pain in a person’s life. We don’t like to be told “no” you can’t do that. 

Healthy Mental Processing: Limitations are losses to be grieved. 

• Acknowledge the limitation. 
• Grieve the limitation. 
• Listen for the lie limitation has posited in your thinking. (ex. You are stupid.) 
• Correct the lie with truth.  
• Accept the limitation. 

Healthy Mindset: Do not identify yourself according to your limitation. Rather, understand your limitation to be part of your unique story and an aspect beloved by God the Father. Pivot your thinking away from limitations and on to opportunities. 

Healthy Action: A lot of good is instore for you even with your limitation. Invest in those areas you can contribute and improve in.  

Definition: Weaknesses are those things that we struggle to do well, but with effort and resources, can improve.  

• Potential examples: Improving a skill, Learning a trade, Growing positive character qualities 

Reality: The ceiling of our abilities is most likely untried. We can make meaningful gains in many areas of our life. 

Healthy Mental Processing: We need to discern the difference between limitations in our lives and weaknesses. 

Healthy Mindset: God has given us the responsibility to steward our abilities. Continuing to grow and learn is part of the human flourishing He calls us into. 

Healthy Action: Growth is a function of effort over time. Engage the growth process.